Why am I not wealthy enough to fly to England and see this?

According to The Guardian, Robert and David Goodale's play Perfect Nonsense—an adaptation of P. G. Wodehouse's 1938 book The Code of the Woosters—will open in England at the Duke of York's Theatre on October 30th. The play will star Stephen Mangan (star of the BBC's Dirk Gently TV series) as Bertie Wooster and Matthew Macfadyen (Keira Knightley's mournful-looking but hot Mr. Darcy) as his indomitable valet Jeeves.

I am ridiculously jealous of the people who will get to see this. Maybe my local movie theater will do one of those weird "On-Screen Event" things and I'll be able to see it that way...?