Clear your schedule, Mr. Cronenberg. Please.

See, at first I thought Bret Easton Ellis (who recently announced that he would like to write a movie adaptation of Fifty Shades of Grey) was describing the book's protagonists as "potentially great comedic characters", and that seemed fair. Sadly, I was wrong. He actually said they were "potentially great cinematic characters", which... uh, no. Sorry.

Although the idea of David Cronenberg directing the movie adaptation is straight-up hilarious.